demi0urgos (demi0urgos) wrote,

Sigil and Freud

Light, in the absence of eyes, illuminates nothing.Visible forms are not inherent in the world, but are granted by the act of seeing. Though the world and events do exist independent of mind, they obtain of no meaning in themselves: none that the mind is not guilty of imposing on them. I bid my people follow, and like all good equations, they follow; for full endowment of purpose, they do submit - in turn, they resign me to a role inhuman, impossible, and unaccountable. But I can no longer stand the sleepless nights...

Two months before I saw this Aeon Flux episode (and, thus, before I learned of the Demiurge, but years after I gained an interest in the Cathars, a Gnostic sect opposed to this entity) I wrote an essay about lightness and darkness. It was a meandering essay and not one I care to link to, but the premise was that we should not value one over the other as it would be impossible for us to exist without either, and that light destroying darkness or darkness destroying light is a good thing because it leads to color, perception, and thus, beauty.

Yin-Yang, yada, yada, yada.

This led to some froriginal (a term I defined where an idea is original to me, though most ideas have already been thought, published, disproved, revised, supported, republished, accepted, and forgotten) Gnostic discoveries. Most important was that there should be no division of light and darkness in value and that any such division was artificial and caused by the seemingly overwhelming presence of darkness. "Is it because, in the universe, the sheer volume of darkness consumes the minuscule pinpoints of light that dot the earth's sky?"

More yada.

I then watched the episode, and I then read some required reading for my English class that mentioned the Cathars, and I then read more and learned the Cathar/Demiurge link. I then wrote an essay on the subject. I then began talking to a woman who was working on a Modern Gnostic study (randomly of course, I didn't bring up the subject.) Now movies, I am constantly presented with the opportunity to watch Gnostic inspired movies (such as The Matrix, Pleasantvill, 2001, Aeon Flux, The Maxx, even Groundhog's Day.)

Pieces always seam to fall in to place for me. As Peachy is my witness, I have an unnatural ability to foresee the future of things. I'll mention to Peachy a foriginal, awesome, billion-dollar idea, and a week later, the idea shows up in a happy little press release recently made possible by the expiration of some NDA. I don't (or haven't) considered this magical, I just chalk it up to my grasp of technology being strong enough that I can imagine what is going to happen next, see the next stage in the natural evolution of machines, but not strong enough to make a dime off of it ;-)

This phenomena also happens in the mundane world though.

Of course, this might not be magical either, maybe these things are just happening all the time and, of course, being awakened to a new piece of knowledge, I can now be aware of these seemingly coincidental occurrences.

Sometimes these progressions, however, run out of control as this Demiurge progression is.

Months ago, when I started this blog, I made an interesting icon to go along with my new persona.

It is, in essence, my lightness/darkness essay and a math joke all rolled in to one.

One of my meanderings about math was language (or at least English) can lead to some silly semantical confusion.

For instance, "One division" actually means something that is divided into two. Something that is divided by one means a whole, and so does the phrase "no divisions." However, division by zero is impossible.

Bring in lightness and darkness, and the perceived division, and then mix in the concept of 0 divisions (circle around the division symbol) and you see my desired perspective. Mix in the concept of division by zero, and you see my fears, that this dream is impossible. And, obviously, the image is very much divided, almost yin-yang-esque.

I have always wanted a tattoo, but could never decided on what to choose. I was going to choose this as my probable mark.

Fast forward to today: a friend of mine (we'll say "Tofu-Jerky" for now, but I know I have a better food memory than that) sent me a video presentation describing the power of sigils.

Were it not for the overwhelming sequence of coincidence and timeliness (a subject I hope to writing about soon) of this sudden injection of the occult, it would not give me pause at all.

The idea of a sigil is to take symbols that posses meaning to you (in the video's case, letters) and simplify them in to a singular symbol and use it as a foci (focus? help me out here.)

Am I already in the possession of a sigil? Would this sigil lead me to my ultimate desire, a world with fewer divisions?

More importantly, is it cool enough for a tattoo, and if so, how big and where?

Ultimately, in the battle between light and darkness, I wish to remain an innocent creator.

I think I am learning to love the Demiurge -- Trevor Goodchild: [opening lines of original 'first' episode, "The Demiurge"]

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