July 10th, 2006


Two More Dishes and a Microphone

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Speaking of dishes. I went on Craig's list and told the world at large that I needed a stack of SatTV dishes. This guy mails me and tells me he has two. He said he was on 3rd and Clemont in SF.

I hop on my bike at 1900 3rd Street and bike to his number (we'll say 666 for fun.)

There is no 666 on 3rd street. I ask around and a nice lady tells me I want 3rd AVE!!!!!

"Where is it?"

"Ten blocks up Geary."

Ten blocks up Geary means biking my ass up a very tall hill. Ten blocks, all up hill.

A million hours later, I'm drenched in sweat and cresting Geary. I roll my way over and find the dishes on the curb. I pick them up and realize, my concept for getting them back depended highly on flat terrain and a short distance. I sling both over my shoulder and head over to Turk (from Turk I can downhill most of the way.)

I ride the breaks and try my best to maintain sub 15MPH speeds.

SF is full of freaks. They are a dime a dozen there. People will avert their eyes from most poor, twisted souls. I must have been the freak of the day because I was turning heads. I had two cop cars stop me (while I am balancing atop a towering mountain bike, only one hand to balance myself, nose down on a hill, dishes swinging in the breeze) because I was just that interesting today.

When I finally got to the flats, I was dead tired. Not just from exertion, but from holding my body in such a way that I could survive the ride back. I couldn't make it. I was at one end of 3rd street and didn't have the energy to forge on.

Just then, a BEAUTIFUL India woman came riding by, going my way, down 3rd street. She was wearing as little clothing as a selfrespecting woman could wear in public.

Reinvigorated, I followed her for the remaining 19 blocks

I'd watch her left cheek tighten, and the right relax. Then, half way through the stroke, I'd watch her right cheek tighten and her left relax. She had a powerful, slow cadence. Her legs heaved like twin pythons inching along the amazon. She was like a study of the human body played in slow mo. And her dark, Dark, DARK skin glistening with sweat.

Nothing aides cycling distances like a good distraction.
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