- To go back to work means giving up control of 60 hours of my life a week.
- Even if I seek stability, there is none, anywhere in the industry, at least within a reasonable driving distance to my child.
- I will forever need to cultivate a competitive spirit to remain successful in my profession or further risk stability.
- I will get next to no vacation. My experiences with my child will be few and fleeting.
- Just by virtue of being stuck at work over 40 hours a week, I may quickly lose access to my child as my busy work week will, undoubtedly, be exploited by Milo's mother.
What do I do? I cannot do this. I would rather live in poverty than neglect my child.
What do I do? But if I do that, I will become a derelict with a weak support structure for my son.
If I had no fear of consequence, Milo and I would be driving across the world, experiencing it day to day. In the future, I would pick him up from public school everyday and our adventure would begin there.
I almost want to drop my career and work in the same school district as my child just so I may simply share his hours.
So maybe that's next. Seeing what schools are hiring IT nerds so I can continue to have an active life with my kid. Or even more drastic, becoming a career teacher.
What is next?